Self, Selfies, & Selfish

As teens or young adults we are rarely given instruction on how to choose a mate. Our parents tell us "go to school", "get a good job", and my favorite "and remember: you can always love a rich man as much as you can a poor man." The other day I shared with my husband an exercise I learned in college. A professor asked his class of 28 (or so) grad students what they would do if told they had only three months left to live. Setting aside, he told us, all the details of having a will, burial instructions, and other legal matters, how would you spend these last three months, he asked. 

He turned on a lovely piece of classical music so that we could contemplate his question and then he left the room. Twenty minutes later he returned, turned off the music and asked "anyone want to share?" One man across the room thrust his arm into the air and shouted "I'd divorce my wife!". In a quiet voice the professor asked "How many of you feel the same way?" The response was astonishing as hands flew up into the air. So, why did we marry these people and so casually decide to walk away at a time when our husband or wife could show us what it means to be cherished, to offer comfort, support, and tender words of prayer?